Sunday, May 16, 2010

ALTERNATIVE COMICS The IMPRISONMENT



Well the last to days were nothing short of terrifyingly weird as a minor slip of the tongue ( or rather keyboard) cost me a brief incarceration and subsequent unimaginable torture. Fortunately my good friend Blackbeard got me out on a technicality and my imprisonment ended much quicker than it felt. On the advice of my rescuer and mystical attorney, I dare not go into details regarding who or why I was held captive for it was the simple act of identifying those responsible which first put me in peril. On the other hand I see no problem in my sharing the actual experience.

As I just mentioned I wrote about a certain something which is most forbidden to speak of, a heavily guarded and policed topic of concern. Before I'd completed discussing the story I blacked out and awoke in a tiny little cell. The room was fully furnished and carpeted comfortably but the unfamiliar surroundings left me in an unusual loss of control. I was dressed in a white shirt and a pair of Khakis and my hair had grown back full on, possibly plugs. My finger nails were manicured and my teeth had been cleaned yet without any recollection the improvements succeeded only in inspiring fear.

In the room I had a television which turned on in the morning with numerous smiling faces citing happy weathers and local news. When the program ended the prison door opened and a sharp piercing noise forced me to exit the room. There were no guards that I could see but my motions were predetermined as I felt forced into a reasonably luxurious car which drove itself to the work camp. Upon arriving at the labour site, an infinitely storied complex I was ejected politely from the vehicle with a shock. There was a steam of other prisoners all decorated similarly, shuffling their way past the lobby into tiny compartment. Many formalities such a hellos and small liquid refreshments were also subliminally inflicted upon us. After drinking the liquid I felt a narcotic sensation and was compelled to make strange phone calls and upload large files. Before I knew it. yet simultaneous with my exhaustion a bell rang and the building flooded out to the lots.

Bumper to bumper the cars all slowly moved along a barren stretch of concrete I hypothesized to be a great conveyor belt. My car dropped me back to the door of my cell only this time there were two baby's and a housewife and maid. As I walked through the door, which shut right behind me, the maid disappeared and the wife brought a drink. I sat down on the couch and noticed the room had gotten bigger, but despite the enlargement there was still no way out. The television news began reporting new stories, mostly about whether, charities, and the occasional foreign disturbance. There was a surreal conditioning to the air all around me and I began to get unexpectedly comfortable as I sank in the chair.

It was as the sun set that I lifted the bottle set out by my housewife and I nearly consumed it when I scratchy but familiar voice broke through the relaxing dream. "Don't even think about it" It was Blackbeard. He took the drink from my hands and poured peculiarly around the floor. The weird patterns that formulated from the spillage were bizarre beyond description. They were not geometric nor hieroglyphic, nor did they resemble any symbol or even stain. Blackbeard pushed me up from the chesterfield with on hand on each shoulder and leaned forward grunting the following instructions. " You've got to walk along those marks I made and focus quite deeply on everything that really matters and all of your hopes, goals, and dreams. Those marks I made are specifically different and no one routine or idea can retrace those steps. You're only way out of here is to break the routine and your only hope of doing that now is to walk a new pattern."

I remembered the comics and the aliens and unknown , so nodding to Blackbeard I jumped to the floor. The tracks were nearly impossible to navigate as no man, monster or ballerina could truly move their legs according to the steps. Forcefully turning my knees inside out and walking on parts of my feet I had never been aware of I found a way to move through the extravagant chaos. I must have broken two toes and severely strained my shoulder as the bruising has yet to even minutely subside. Nevertheless, all contorted and determination I made it and once the dance was completed I found myself home.

I am now back in my studio, totally bald and dressed in black, and a little bit stronger and wiser than before the insidious incident. But that is just how things tend to evolve whenever Blackbeard's involved. A horrible situation equals sincere revelation over and over as life rolls on. Thanks for saving my a-- again Blackbeard I'll find that book you're looking for first thing tomorrow.

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